like, everyone is supposed to be happy and here i am annoyed by the freaking lights everywhere and the inescapable consumerism and the christmas lights piss me off. i hate christmas shopping, then i end up panicking and rushing it and of course, i get even more pissed off because i'm right there with everyone the week before christmas panic buying. but on the other hand, there are days i can't help but smile at all the twinkling lights, the smell of coffee and cinnamon and you see people look really happy, overspend and bring out their credit cards.

sometimes all i want to do is lie down under the christmas tree again and be drunk and laughing and you know the view right? you're surrounded by gifts that you can't help but pick up and shake. then you look up and it's amazing.

there's this little tunnel to the star at the top, like the path to happiness. you see branches and bump your head against he rough pine trunk. it's all lights and reflections off silver blue green gold bouncing off the balls and the little things that in later years will break and you'll find them at the bottom of the box looking quite sad. when we were younger the trees were always real, cut down from the yard and sometimes they would be a little too small, sometimes so tall their tops would press against the ceiling. the needles itched when they brushed across your face. my sisters and i would throw these little plastic like decorations so that they'd stick to the branches. fun times (plus the gifts! i remember the big barbie house the best. that was a huge pink gift for all three of us with pink windows and a balconaje.)

the trees would resemble overdressed, too tall gentlemen covered in their girlfriend's boas because their girlfriends are hunting up champagne in the kitchen for their little private after party. i feel like that about christmas sometimes. like you're a little out of place, maybe you've outgrown it a bit or the party's over and you're a tad under dressed. or maybe it's just the holiday blues.

hello, journal.
it's been ages.

my life is


work
beautiful lies
downloads
lying in bed while the sun streaks through the blinds and i think, shit four more hours and work again.

it's been ages. i'm going to make pancakes and eggs for breakfast-lunch-dinner at 3 am.

in my dream last night i was on a ship and there was a couple making it starboard side
i was pissed cause i kept trying to leave the boat and my father wouldn't let me as we floated down the river
there was a sunset that just died and died and died.

sudden cut to my mother and i standing at the concession stand in the old empire movie theater. she was trying to get them to microwave the popcorn bags she bought with her. i was drinking can after can of sarsi.

i woke up in the strangest of moods, let me tell you.

stuck in my head so i might go for a walk to shake it loose


just so you know this journal isn't dead, only dormant. and for different things.

hmm i've been here in boracay for five (yup, count em) days. i'll be here till the 31st.

i have a room to myself, tv, music, food, wifi and im working most of the day. it's great cause my job lets me go anywhere--i just need internetz. (for pron, kidding).

i got drunk yesterday with grace  and chatted up this dude from australia. he was harmless, les, dont worry. i loves you. it was cool cause the bar had a pool, or the pool had a bar. two of my favorite things: swimming and drinking.

although one should take precautions when swimming and drinking.

 i also slept really long and woke up at 4 am to watch the rain fall down and move all the clothes hung outside in a panic. then i sat on a chair and tried to wait for sunrise, but i got sleepy. i worked most of the morning, saw jasmine off (her flight was at 130, cause she got an earlier flight) i wish asia or jasmine were here with me. anyone really. asia, mostly, but ATENEO is in the FINALS, so there :p GO ASIA. haha. GO ATENEO (sorry UP, but you do know that sports isn't your strong suit).

the point of this post is: i'm a little bored. haha. so if you guys (especially the borderline alcoholics like me) happen to be in boracay from today till the 31st send me smoke signals haha, text me call me, show up at my resort. please. ang loser talaga. hindi kasi bagay sa akin na mag-isa.

I love the human race's tendency to be so stupid. I mean honestly...check this link out: Penguin Book Tops Most Challenged List

I understand the need for censorship. Remember all those Bugs Bunny cartoons that they banned because of racist overtones? They even banned some Tom and Jerry ones if I recall correctly. I understand the need of a government to regulate what its people spew out on a regular basis and the need for people to fight back. The age old argument of freedom of speech versus censorship.

Think the People Vs Larry Flint, or that trial where they put a guy away because he kept giving Nazi speeches to young, misguided teenagers and incited them to kill and rape. I understand the need to regulate content, especially on the Internet, where people think anonymity is equal to getting away with bullshit. Hello, child porn enthusiasts. Sick, sick, sick. You freaking sick people. There are two sides to every point of view, but you can never justify child porn to me and don't you dare use the first amendment to justify your perversions. But I digress.

Now here's the thing that pisses me off (aside from child p0rn which makes me disgusted and sad). If you're a parent, you have all the right to keep your precious little baby from reading books with what you think is inappropriate content.

It doesn't take away the fact that Mark Twain's Huckleberry Finn is an accurate writing of that time. Racism? Of course it's racist. People were racist during that time. People hung other people from trees because they had different colored skin. People are still racist. Ask Filipinos working overseas or living in other countries.

Books like that are written to remind us of what people went through during that time. You do not seek to ban it from the public library simply because you don't agree with it. Literature, social revolutions and history are intertwined. Just because you think it's inappropriate, doesn't mean other people will. Or the other way around.

Ban a book about a penguin with two fathers? Oh wait, challenge it? Some little boy or girl out there will read that and think that someone understands him or her. That's probably what the author wrote it for. You can't pretend that it doesn't exist. If you don't accept homosexuality, then don't let your kids read it. Don't deprive other people of great literature. Think of what people can learn from books. I learned a great many things from what I read--especially things I don't agree with. It comes with reading, knowing how to accept, what to accept.

If you're concerned about what your child is reading, be interested in what she or he is reading. Know what they like to read. Use it to educate them instead of banning it. Regulate the content coming into your home. My mother banned me from reading several books when I was younger, or simply edited out (by stapling pages together) parts of the books she didn't want me to read. What books were these? Sweet Valley High (I was only allowed to read it in high school), several Anne Rice books and some I can't remember. Besides, I always found a way to read the ones I was dying to read. Yes, school and public libraries are keepers of the books. Whatever books they are. Ban them because they are badly written, or promote terrible things. Not Huckleberry Finn. Not Beloved. Not I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings. These books speak truth and to deprive people from truth deprives people of the purpose of literature in the first place.

Think about that.

was CRAZY! I shall divide it into three parts. forgive the strangeness in punctuation. My shoulder's acting up and I can't really sit still long enough to edit.


I. RYU GREY!

Glanna gave birth yesterday. We were joking about it over dinner at Orry's place in La Union that on the day that we weren't in Baguio, Glanna would give birth. So we ended up drunk calling Rohan at 1 or so in the morning screaming incoherent things at him. Other things should not be mentioned in polite company. Basta, ang kulit. Poor Rohan. Na-bombard ng mga lasingero ng di oras!

Rosie: "Oh wow, Ryu Grey!"
Then she passed out. Hilariousness.

Welcome to the Planet, Mr. RYU GREY! We went by the hospital today to visit Rohan and Glanna and their new baby Ryu. He's hairy. And very very warm. ♥ ♥ &hearts:

II. LA UNION!

Bus fare 80 php
Food chip in 109 php
2 packs yosi 80 php
chips and other unnecessary food (like stuffins) 75 php

the expression on carlo's face when rohan texted that glanna gave birth PRICELESS

and other great moments

"GLLLAAANNNA GGGAAAAAVVVEE BIIIIIRRRTTH!!!" (followed by incoherent drunk screaming)
Carlo's winner line of the night
The giant shotglass that got everyone wasted
Aliah and Tina climbing up cabinets
The beautiful beautiful house by the river, complete with suha, makopa, ilang-ilang, manggo and tree climbing tree. The bamboo floor and Rosie's hammock. The fish pond and the little make out bridge like a movie set.


Toni Gonzaga: O, hindi kita pwedeng mahalin.
Sam Milby: Bakit? May tinatago ka bang sikreto? May boyfriend ka na? Kasal ka na?
Toni Gonzaga: Hindi. Tilapia talaga ako. (Jumps off beautiful bridge wrapped in flowers and vines into river. In the background, ducklings waddle by. Rosie is following them).

I swear that was funny when we were drunk. And how the house was SO HUGE but we were all huddled on the steps getting louder and louder with every shot.

HILOG! (Don't ask)
Caviar and strawberries
"Where's my phone?" - Les
The mutant cockroach the size of a big toe that I Murdered
Taking a bath in the rain/river bathing
Conserving water
Rosie chasing after ducklings making clucking sounds
Playing god with little tilapias. Terrorizing fish is fun.
"The house moved me" -Carlo
"Oh my God, you're my sis?" - Orry
"I'm trying to help him with his problem and he turns and WALKS AWAY/!!" - RM


And many more psycho moments brought to you by Red Horse Beer and GSM Blue.


III. IROOOONNNNNNMMMAAANNNNNNNN!!!

I love how the Black Sabbath song plays the whole time, but subtly. It's incorporated into the score and soundtrack but not a word is heard. Hrr. Except that the way he flies is ghey. Ghey, i tell you.

WATCH THIS MOVIE. ITS WORTH EVEN THE HORRIBLY OVERPRICED IMAX TICKETS.

this is what we were talking about during dinner last thursday (i watched friday, but left to go to la union before i could blog it. haller, i has a life to live)

My sister mentioned that she was watching Iron Man and I was like NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. I have work!

Followed by:

Me: Tomorrow I will be lined up before SM even opens. I will be clutching a slurpee and a giant bag of popcorn.
Ticket Lady: Ma'am, hindi pa po tapos, ung next showing po--
Me: (ala Crocker in Fairy Godparents) IRONMAN!
Ticket Lady: Eh, maam, isang oras pa--
Me: Ironman! *Rabid drooling*

The plot plots were predictable, especially if you know the Iron Man comic. BUT WHO GIVES A FLYING BANANA! I love how Robert Downey Jr. was so perfect for this role. Gwyneth Paltrow's legs are incredible (and so were her shoes). aahh, the shoes.

Best Line: "Yes, and I also take out the trash." ^^ A very good superhero movie that doesn't disappoint (Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer), doesn't delve into super stupid cheesiness (Ghostrider). It's as good as the Spider-Man series (without the emo-drama of the second or third) and Batman Begins (without the liberal dosage of angst and Dark Knightness). Well done! IAMIRONMAN!!! (But the way he flies is ghey).

Electric windmill skyline
The cracking soil beneath my feet
These pearls drenched with lust
This empty bed, the sweat soaked sheets
It's like they emptied out the ocean
Bodies mending this scorched earth
It's like they emptied out the ocean
Bodies mending this scorched earth
So call me on your long walks home
Where drunken voices bleed into one

If you're not in love, stay where you are
If you're not in love, stay where you are
If you're not in love, stay where you are
If you're not in love, stay where you are

I will to you the smell of burning leaves
Rusted windchimes and the feverish glow of fireflies
We were such terrible liars
We were such passionate lovers
We were such terrible liars
We were such passionate lovers
So call me on your long walks home
Where drunken voices bleed into one

If you're not in love, stay where you are
If you're not in love, stay where you are
If you're not in love, stay where you are
If you're not in love, stay where you are

We awoke on your cluttered bed
To the schoolchildren below
Our teeming hearts
Habitual words are effortlessly false
We were such terrible liars
We were such passionate lovers
We were such terrible liars
We were such passionate lovers
We were such terrible liars
We were such passionate lovers
We were such terrible liars
We were such passionate lovers
(Call me on your long walks home
Where drunken voices bleed into one)

If you're not in love, stay where you are
If you're not in love, stay where you are
If you're not in love, stay where you are
If you're not in love, stay where you are
Stay where you are
If you're not in love, stay where you are
Stay where you are
If you're not in love, stay where you are

Fairy Tales

 

Walt Disney should be hung for false propaganda.

There are no Charmings.

You rarely get what you wish for,

That dream is a wish business?
Nonsense!

 

Sometimes the stepmother gets her way

Snow White falls down dead.

The dwarves just watch her grave until they rot.

 

The wolf eats Red

And she lets him.

 

The princess in the tower waits forever

Growing mad until the brick echoes with her laughter.

 

And there are no endings. At least not for this one.

last year naggraduate ako. congrats to all the graduates, especially the UP 2008 centennial batch.
hooray.

i had a job. for a while. then another, for a while.  wala lang. wala naman akong masyadong ambition. isa lang talaga eh, eversince. the one and only thing i want to do with my life. people suggest i teach. can you imagine me teaching?

"are you all morons or something?" the poor students i will subject my personality to.
i think it's called the mid twenties crisis. 

i'm bored now. and my options are a) teach koreans or b) call center again, if i want to remain in beautiful baguio. or i could just bum around forever.  or i could move to a beach island and waitress. hahaha. i like that concept. i also like the concept of the call center, if only to fund my vanity business. whee. 

:)

would it be corny if you and your significant other got the same tattoo on different body parts? hahaha.

tired. i haven't been sleeping well.

nicked from vladimiria



i honestly think i am more of a 5AM, still up cause i'm watching reruns of the sopranos.

i wish yakult came in bottles as big as gatorade.

For most of you who don't know, I live in a small town that fancies itself to be a city. Or a city with a small-town mentality. "Town" is really Session Road, a stretch of hilly road reminiscent of San Francisco, without the trams. At the top of town is ShoeMart, this monstrosity of a mall that oddly enough, resembles a circus tent, without the jugglers and acrobats and human cannonballs. I spent most of my college life happily cutting class there.

Between SM and the market are several shops: like OMG, the vegetarian place (good food, bad coffee, but excellent dalandan and chow mein). There are the usual coffee places, fast food, Korean restaurants, Korean pizza (yes, an odd concept), the odd Mongolian grill and 24/7 convenience stores. There are salons, Trinity boutique for those who like well made jackets, the Filipino cell phone repair and e-load shop and of course, the billiard halls and carienderias. I recommend Manang Patz/Greenhouse on Assumption Road. Can’t miss it, best hepatitis-laden pork steak in town.

From central Session, roads branch out and upwards towards the schools. Here are the little shops: the tiny tattoo shop where I got my mermaid with System of a Down blasting from the radio, the karaoke/videoke places and in one notable area, a duckpin bowling alley. And of course, the computer shop where my friends and I waste our money and days playing Warcraft. The Shop, as none of us apparently know its name.

This is odd, since I know Session Road got its name from a session (har har) some dudes had about Baguio when the Americans decided to make this city a hill station. They liked the weather here, go figure. I don’t remember my history that well. But if you’re ever in Baguio, look by the old terminal near the top of Session Road. Past the markets is Baden-Powell Inn. You can’t miss it, there’s a gorgeous black Mini Coop there that I’ve been plotting to steal for the past three years. There’s a plaque there commemorating the event.

At the bottom of Session the road splits in half, spreading out towards the other smaller malls and City Hall, the fire station, the police station and a couple of hotels. Near the overpass is the market. You can find mostly anything there. Silver, Baguio’s famous brooms, peanut brittle, fresh herbs like basil, fish, clams in season, strawberries, fruit, mangosteens and my personal favorite: the rich dark Benguet coffee that you can have ground straight from the bean and take home in a paper bag.

From town the city spreads itself out into various “suburban” area with names ranging from City Camp and Navy Base (courtesy of the American occupation) and gems like Honeymoon Holyghost (the best name ever!) Of course, there are various secret places and secret restaurants like the long-mourned Salud Bistro that the locals prefer to keep to themselves, or only show to trusted friends who won’t wreak havoc by telling the poseur out of town crowd who’ll go because it’s “cool”. Do you disagree? Check out Nevada Square. It used to be the best place in town.

Anyway, why am I writing about Baguio? The small town mentality is kicking in, that’s why. The same mentality that prompts my father to ask the lineage of all my Baguio based friends.

“Who’s that?”

“My friend Etc.”

“I see, who’s Etc’s dad/mom/great grandfather/homo sapien ancestor?”

“So and so.”

“Ah, I know him. I used to (insert information that will shock and allure here) with him.”

Hence, as Lisa says, you have to breed at least three generations in this city before people know who you are. The problem with that is that people generally meddle in everybody’s affairs AND those who usually have the power maintain the power (what a fatalistic point of view, I know).

Hence we come to the point of this blog. Read Baguio Insider Someone is planning to build a a 200M parking lot in Burnham Park. Not that I like Burnham Park or anything. My heart pounds whenever the rare event of crossing it at night has to happen.

It’s nice and all, but the flowers look slightly urine colored and the smell coming from the lake is horrendous. Apparently most residents take it as their own free toilet/dump. I took a boat trip there once for a film assignment and counted 12 Red Horse bottles. How dare you defile Red Horse that way, you cretins! Kidding aside, that would be an obvious thing to do right? Clean it up? I don’t know. My mother would say, hello Rose, you can’t even clean your room. But at least people don’t walk around in my room on a regular basis.

I love this city, as much as I whine and complain that it’s too cold and boring but I’d rather have a nice pretty San Fran-reminiscent city that a city full of useless edifices. Come on, City Hall! What the hell are you thinking? I thought we were over this with Vergara! I heard rumors that your planning sessions included making Baguio cleaner, greener and more beautiful. Yey for you if this pushes through. Arroyo gives you government land and the City (not you specifically Mr. Mayor, as you are a mayor but not exactly Sauron ruling Mordor with an iron fist) the City decides to exploit it for a freaking parking lot. If traffic is such a bad thing, why don’t you check on taxi licenses and jeepney routes?

Parking lots, overpasses and executive orders that don’t last are not the way. You bureaucratic dim bulbs. It makes me sad to see the city treated this way. Just sad. As my father is fond of saying, “Fools!”

and thus this sets the tone of the post. randomness galore.

^^ me and les (oh pardon, les and i) have a new couple obsession: world of warcraft.
puppy pile! (and no, i'm not explaining)
i dominated in dota today. (YES! radiancexmekansm and arcaneringxorchidmalevolence is the shizney)
there's a surprise waiting around the corner. (and someone's somewhere doing something sneaky)
and i'm not broke. (but i will be, soon!)
new story: here. productive aren't we?

baguio is so darn cold. fuzzy sweaters and bonnet wearing cold. i'm typing and i'm wearing a bonnet. i sleep wearing a bonnet, with head buried under blankets.

i want to go to Morg on Feb 29 but it's my mom's birthday! i want to go the beach but it's too damn cold! i want oodles of money but i'm too lazy to make it.

let's have a party! i have a menu and everything! (popsicles, quirky sandwiches, lemon butter tuna pasta and cupcakes!)

it's sad when you realize that your inner self is such a lazy bum and that you're perfectly content to do nothing at all, all day. not even bathe. you just curl up on couches and read and smoke cigarettes and write. which is, for me, doing nothing.

let's work out. i need to swim. let's go to the beach, it's super cold this time of year, but who cares? there may even be jellyfish. (yerk).